Christmas In Bevelle
by jackdagger
Summary: The entire FFX gang gets together on Christmas Eve. Of course, the night is rather dysfunctional... snowballs, food fights, Santa, and more.
1. Home for the Holidays

((Author's Note: I started writing this fic around Christmastime and decided to put it up. I never finished it, but I'll get around to it sometime. I don't own the characters, yadda yadda yadda...))  
  
Snow flurried down on the city of Bevelle. Cozy inside Yuna's new home, the group was relaxing. Yuna, hovering above the floor, was placing a glass ornament on the large Christmas tree. Wakka was busy inside the kitchen, making sugar cookies in the shape of reindeer. Rikku was curled up next to Auron, looking up at him admiringly, sipping her Wild Cherry Pepsi. Auron was either too drunk to notice, or care. Kimahri was clumsily trying to string cranberries on a piece of ribbon, but wasn't having much luck with his enormous Ronso hands. Lulu was sitting by herself near the window, sucking on a candy cane and reading some sort of novel. Tidus and Seymour were in comfy armchairs, watching the broadcasted Blitzball game on TV and taking momentary breaks to glare at each other in contempt.  
  
"OW! AH! DIRTY SON OF A SHOOPUF!" came a loud, aggravated voice from the kitchen. Black smoke billowed out into the living room and the smoke alarm went off.  
  
"Wakka? You okay in there?" Yuna called.  
  
"I'm fine, I'm fine," came the reply. The alarm stopped. Wakka walked out of the kitchen carrying a silver tray with what looked like shriveled up black pieces of tree bark. He was covered head to toe in soot, an there were a few singe marks on his apron, which read "Gecc Dra Luug". "Cookie?" he asked abashedly.  
  
Everyone was silent.  
  
Kimahri broke the awkward pause with a loud, frustrated roar. "Kimahri's big strong Ronso hands meant for breaking men in two. Kimahri can't make Christmas decorations!"  
  
"But we need those for the tree!" Yuna begged. "The dried cranberry garland looks so nice against the green branches."  
  
"Why don't you ask your brothers to help you?" Seymour asked. He paused. "Oh, no wait, that's right. I killed them all." He guffawed loudly as Kimahri tensed up. Wakka walked over to Yuna, still holding the tray.  
  
"Who invited Maester Seymour, ya? He doesn't seem to belong here."  
  
"Lulu did," Yuna shrugged. "I don't know why. Ask her."  
  
"But it's your house, Yuna! Didn't you stop her?"  
  
"Maybe I would, if I had a backbone!" Yuna said cheerfully, hanging the next ornament- a figure of Ifrit made out of a pinecone and googily eyes. Wakka shrugged.  
  
"You insult Kimahri, strong Ronso warrior? You pay for hurting Kimahri's feelings!" Kimahri walked over to Seymour, who was still sitting in the chair, and towered over him. "I challenge you to fight... I challenge you to SNOWBALL FIGHT!"  
  
Seymour raised an eyebrow.  
  
Tidus, who was asleep in his chair, suddenly woke up in a puddle of his own drool. "Did I hear snowball fight?" he squeaked.  
  
"I wanna be on Sir Auron's team!" Rikku hollered happily, jumping up and bouncing on her feet.  
  
"I told you, not to call me Sir," Auron murmured grumpily.  
  
Yuna floated down to the floor. "I want to be on my Tidus-pooh's team!"  
  
"Aw, I want to be on Tidus' team!" Wakka whined. "Come on, Tidus! You know we'd make great partners, brudda!" He winked at Tidus, who shifted uncomfortably in his seat.  
  
"No, Tidus is MY partner!" Yuna yelled, shoving Wakka weakly.  
  
"Tidus is mine!" Wakka protested, flicking her forehead.  
  
"Oh that's it!" Yuna shrieked, tackling Wakka to the floor.  
  
"Oooh, catfight," Lulu murmured to herself, rolling her eyes.  
  
As Yuna and Wakka were scuffling on the ground, Kimahri looked at Tidus. "Partners?" he asked simply.  
  
"Please," Tidus answered.  
  
Tidus and Kimahri walked outside, followed by Rikku, who was hanging off Auron's arm. Auron still had his mug and was sipping from it tipsily.  
  
Wakka looked up from gnawing on Yuna's ankle. "Hey!" he cried.  
  
Yuna looked up from her yanking Wakka's hair. "They're leaving without us!" They both jumped up from the floor and raced out the door.  
  
Lulu and Seymour were left alone in the room. Seymour looked over at Lulu, smirking slightly. "Shall we?"  
  
Lulu didn't look up from her book. "Snowball fights really aren't my thing."  
  
Seymour turned around in his chair. "Oh? Then what is?"  
  
Suddenly a huge patch of snow smacked against the window near Lulu. Lulu didn't flinch. Lots of yelling was coming from outside.  
  
"Funny..." Seymour began, flipping his hair out of his face. "That Ronso wanted to have a snowball fight to get even with me. Do any of them realize I'm not even out there?"  
  
"They probably forgot the whole purpose by now," Lulu sighed. "Don't seem so surprised."  
  
"Are all your friends this stupid?"  
  
Lulu opened her mouth crossly to defend them, but she quickly shut it and shrugged her shoulders. "Yes." 


	2. FIGHT!

"BOMBS AWAY!" Tidus stuck one arm out of the snow-fort to throw a poorly made snowball at the others.  
  
"Ow! Tidus! My eye!" screamed Yuna's voice.  
  
"Yuna?" cried Tidus, jumping up from his safe position behind the barricade. "Are you okay?" he asked, frightened. "Yuna?"  
  
"GOTCHA!" screamed Yuna, popping up and pelting him with snowballs. Wakka, Yuna's partner, joined in.  
  
"That's for refusing both of us!" they laughed, not relenting in their rapid fire.  
  
"No fair-MPH!" Tidus cried before getting silenced by a snowball in the mouth. He stumbled backwards. The snowballs stopped. Tidus said, "Finally!" He opened his eyes... to see a gigantic cantaloupe-sized snowball heading for his face.  
  
WHAM! It knocked Tidus over, burying his entire body in the knee-deep snow.  
  
"Nice shot, Kimahri!" Yuna piped.  
  
"Kimahri?" asked Rikku. "Weren't you Tidus' partner?"  
  
Kimahri shrugged. "Kimahri couldn't resist."  
  
Tidus, meanwhile, was unmoving and silent.  
  
"Shouldn't he be getting up?" Rikku asked. She looked to Auron. "Auron?"  
Auron was reclined against the barricade, still drinking. He hiccupped. "Now is the time to shape yer destiny..." He hiccupped again. "And stuff..."  
  
Rikku looked back to Tidus. "Help him up, Kimahri!"  
  
Kimahri reached down one hand and yanked Tidus out of the snow, inspecting him. "Kimahri thinks blonde one is dead," he shrugged.  
  
"WHAT?" everyone else screamed, except Auron, who was pretty out of it.  
  
Yuna ran up to Tidus' limp body. "He's still alive! Does anyone know CPR?"  
  
"Why don't you just cast Cura?" asked Rikku.  
  
"My staff's all the way in the attic, and I'd have to go inside, take off my shoes, climb all those stairs, search for it in all the boxes, come back down, and then-"  
  
"You can't cast white magic without your staff?" asked Rikku. "What kind of a white mage ARE you?"  
  
'That's not the point!" Yuna shouted crossly. "Do you know CPR or not?"  
  
"I do! I do!" Wakka shouted heroically. He plodded over to Tidus like a superhero. Wakka knelt down next to Tidus and thrust his mouth to his. Tidus convulsed slightly to Wakka's force. His legs kicked. Wakka hesitantly pulled away.  
  
Tidus moaned, his eyelids fluttering. "Mommy always said I liked the ice cream sandwiches..." His vision cleared, showing Wakka about an inch away from his face. Tidus screamed, scrambling to his feet.  
  
"Tidus!" cried Yuna, hugging him.  
  
"I didn't know you knew CPR," Rikku said to Wakka.  
  
Wakka grinned widely. "I don't."  
  
Rikku eyed him curiously.  
  
"Let's get him inside," suggested Yuna, trying to hold up the still- groggy Tidus.  
  
The group walked back into the house and entered the living room. Lulu and Seymour were on the couch making out, their arms wrapped around each other. Lulu giggled and ran a hand through the maester's hair.  
  
"Lulu!!!" screeched Yuna.  
  
The couple quickly detached. "Uhm..." Lulu began, fixing her hair. "He was just... urm... giving me mouth-to-mouth."  
  
Yuna fumed, putting her hands on her hips. "Uh-huh..." She spun towards the others. "Do you guys know what this means?"  
  
Rikku snapped her fingers. "We could have just gotten SEYMOUR to revive Tidus!"  
  
"EXACTLY!" Yuna hollered.  
  
"Ya, but if he wasn't there, Lu might have been dead by now," Wakka nodded in all seriousness.  
  
Lulu wrinkled her brow and exchanged a very confused glance with Seymour.  
  
Yuna sighed. "Well, it's a little too late for should-haves. Let's all open presents!" She let out a high-pitched squeal and clasped her hands together. The group gathered around the tree. Yuna reached and picked up a square box with bright red wrapping paper. She squinted and read the tag. "Auron." She passed it to Tidus, who passed it to Rikku, who passed it to Wakka, who passed it to Lulu, who passed it to Seymour, who passed it to Kimahri, who passed it back to Yuna. "Hey, what's the big idea?" asked Yuna. "Why didn't you give it to Sir Auron?"  
  
"Auron's not here..." Tidus observed.  
  
"Well then, where is he?" Yuna said. "He needs to come open his presents!"  
  
"Auron?" Tidus called.  
  
"Sir Auron?" Yuna called.  
  
"Wait a sec..." Rikku said, wrinkling her brow in thought. "Did he ever even come inside?"  
  
The entire clan looked at each other, then scrambled to their feet and bolted out the door. "Sir Auron!" screamed Yuna.  
  
Auron was still propped up against the snow fort, his legs spread. One arm was still inside his coat. The other was holding his sake jug to his mouth, his slightly-parted blue lips nearly touching the tip. His head was rolled to the side, his one working eye half-closed. His skin was purple and covered with a thin layer of ice. Mini-icicles hung from his chin.  
  
"Oh my god! He's dead!" Rikku screamed frantically, falling to her knees and sobbing.  
  
"He can't die," Seymour said dully, standing in the doorway. "He's already dead."  
  
"Oh yeah," Rikku remembered, getting up and dusting the snow off of her clothes. She scurried over to the ronin. She grabbed him by the shoulders and shook him violently. Auron's head bobbled back and forth limply like a dolls'.  
  
"Maybe he need to be thawed," Kimahri suggested.  
  
"Good idea, Kimahri!" Rikku cheerfully replied. "Lulu?"  
  
"I don't think that's a good idea," Lulu said simply, arms crossed.  
  
"Please?" asked Rikku, hugging Auron, lip trembling.  
  
Lulu looked to Yuna. "It might work," Yuna said. Rikku took a step back from Auron. Sighing, Lulu stepped up. With a quick flick of her arm, flames shot out of nowhere, encasing Auron. The group heard a gruff cry of pain, as the flames subsided. Auron fell forwards on to his face.  
  
"Auron!" Rikku cried, rushing to him.  
  
"Root beer..." Auron mumbled desperately.  
  
"What?" Rikku asked.  
  
"Root beer!" Auron repeated, his fingers reaching weakly for his sake jug. Rikku picked it up and put it to Auron's lips. Auron drunk thankfully. After he was done, he wiped his mouth. "Ah, that hit the spot," he said, smiling wearily.  
  
"Sir Auron... so all along what we thought was sake was actually root beer?" Wakka asked, perplexed.  
  
"And what a root beer!" Auron grinned.  
  
"How can you possibly get drunk off of root beer?" Seymour asked.  
  
Lulu shrugged. "It's Auron. He can get drunk off of anything." 


	3. Food Is Meant To Be Eaten

((Woohoo! I finally found my notebook where I had written down the third chapter. Dunno when the rest of the story will be coming, but I do plan on finishing it. Oh, and I upped the rating to PG-13, even though it's probably unnecessary. Just in case, since I know this site can be finicky. Oh yeah, and if everyone gets the FF9 reference, it's cuz I named Eiko "Rikku"... don't ask.))  
  
Not long after, the group finally got themselves seated around the tree. Yuna flopped down cross-legged beside it. She looked around, counting. "Okay! All here! NOW we can exchange presents!" Yuna picked up a small gift bag. "This one's for Tidus!"  
  
"Gimme!" Tidus squealed like a 6-year old at his birthday party. Tidus grabbed the present, and read the tag. "From Wakka." He ripped through the tissue paper, grinning madly. When he reached the contents, however, he made a strange face. Wakka clamped his hand on Tidus' shoulder, leaning towards him. "Merry Christmas, bruddha..." he whispered.  
  
Tidus froze. "Yuna.... Help me..." he whimpered.  
  
"Here's one for Rikku!" Yuna said happily, handing a box to her Al Bhed cousin. Rikku smiled. "Oh, it's from Kimahri." She yanked off the paper to reveal an 8-inch, smiling plastic fashion doll with grossly accentuated features. "A doll?" she asked. "You got me a DOLL?"  
  
Kimahri shrugged. "Kimahri bad at picking out presents."  
  
"It's true, he is," Lulu agreed, remembering the push-up bra she'd received from the Ronso last year.  
  
"How about a few more, and then we eat?" suggested Auron, who was sobering up and could now speak in full sentences.  
  
"Yes! Yes! Let's do that!" Tidus squeaked, still being clutched by Wakka.  
  
Rikku was busy poking at her doll's inflated breast, her eyes tearing up.  
  
Lulu heaved a heavy sigh and rested her head down on Seymour's shoulder. Seymour patted her head sympathetically.  
  
Tidus handed a small box to Yuna. "This is for you, from me," he smiled, looking deep into her eyes.  
  
"Oh, Tidus..." Yuna whispered, unwrapping the gift to reveal a small jewelry case. Yuna's eyes lit up. "You got me a-" She lifted up the top. Her face fell. "What the hell is this?" she asked, holding up a round piece of thin blue film.  
  
"It's a colored contact!" Tidus said. "Yanno... so you won't look like such a mutant!" He smiled happily.  
  
Yuna broke into tears. So now Yuna and Rikku were crying. Tidus soon started to cry too, seeing Yuna cry. He wailed even louder as Wakka tried to comfort him. Auron got out a fresh can of root beer and started chugging it, bubbles dripping down his chin.  
  
"Food?" Kimahri suggested.  
  
The sobbing trio nodded in between sniffles. Kimahri put one arm around Yuna and the other around Rikku, leading them into the dining room. Wakka of course, led Tidus, who was still crying for multiple reasons. Lulu and Seymour were left to try and escort the now-sloshed Sir Auron into where the food was.  
  
Once seated around the table, everyone seemed to be cheered up. Yuna wiped her eyes with her sleeve and smiled a little. "Okay, Rikku and I made a bunch of dishes earlier today. We'll go get them now!" Giggling, her and her cousin exited the room. They came back in with plates of food. There were glazed carrots, dried fruit, mashed potatoes, and even a main course of roasted turkey.  
  
"Wow, it all looks... good!" Lulu said, raising an eyebrow in surprise.  
  
"I even have an oglop I found on the Conde Petite Mountain Path!" Rikku happily proclaimed, holding up a dish. Everyone froze in place. "What?" Rikku asked.  
  
Yuna leaned in towards her cousin and whispered something in her ear that sounded a lot like, "wrong game". Rikku paled and ran into the kitchen. The garbage disposal turned on, and a minute later Rikku returned, smiling as normal. "Okay! All good!" she said. Everyone let out the breath they'd been holding.  
  
On that note, they all started to eat. Yuna started slurping her soup rather loudly. Seymour turned his gaze towards her, annoyed. Tidus noticed this.  
  
"SEYMOUR!" he proclaimed loudly, trying to sound as manly as he could.  
  
Seymour turned his head to Tidus.  
  
"Yeah, you!" Tidus continued. "I saw you looking at her!"  
  
"What?" Seymour asked.  
  
"I saw the way you looked at her! You want her! You're jealous of me! You're in love with my woman!"  
  
"Lady Yuna?" Seymour scoffed. "Believe me, I don't want her. I've never wanted her."  
  
"He needs a real woman," Lulu smirked, resting her chin on her hands and staring at the maester from her seat across from him.  
  
"LIES! LIES!" Tidus screeched. He raised a spoonful of mashed potatoes and...  
  
"You wouldn't dare," Seymour glared at the teenager.  
  
WHAP. A glob of chunky taters hit Seymour smack in the forehead, right between his veins.  
  
Seymour grabbed his napkin and dabbed his face. "Oh, real mature, mister. Do you feel all masculine now-"  
  
WHAP. Another spoonful of potatoey-goodness hit Seymour on the cheek.  
  
"Oh, that's IT!" Seymour roared, scooping up a handful of peas and throwing it at the boy. The globular, verdant mass of vegetables splattered all over Tidus' shocked face.  
  
"You... hit me!" he squeaked.  
  
Seymour smugly sat back and smirked.  
  
Tidus grabbed some more potatoes and threw them at Seymour. But Seymour ducked, and they hit Rikku in the face. Yuna started laughing. Rikku turned and grabbed some baby carrots and threw them at Yuna. Yuna started to cry. Kimahri seemed upset at Yuna crying, so he grabbed the bowl of cranberry sauce and poured it over Rikku's head.  
  
The pissed-off, sticky Al Bhed then started chucking clumps of stuffing and throwing them in every direction. Whoever wasn't hit before was now, and this erupted into a barrage of flying food. Mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce, baby carrots, stuffing, creamed corn, peas, dinner rolls, and everything else on the table were flying through the air.  
  
"Stop wasting food! Stop wasting food!" whined Tidus, banging his fists on the table, even though he started it.  
  
Everyone turned towards Tidus. The flying food stopped.  
  
"That's better," snorted Tidus.  
  
The rest of the group looked at each other, then directed all of their food-throwing to Tidus. When there was no more food left, everyone laughed, making a truce.  
  
"Let's all go take a shower," Yuna suggested. "After, we can all go sit by the fireplace."  
  
Everyone shrugged, then dispersed. 


End file.
